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Dec. 10th, 2005 @ 10:26 pm Baby Clothes Porn
Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: Coldplay - X&Y
Where have baby clothes stores been my whole life? I didn't buy any baby clothes when I was pregnant. Didn't even look at them. Don't know why. It never even occurred to me to do so. Even when I went to register, I didn't really LOOK at the clothes. I only registered for things that I was told I need (x oneies; x sleepers, etc.). And I didn't really LOOK at the cute clothes I got at the baby showers. But boy is that all different now! I went x-mas shopping yesterday and did not buy one x-mas present, but I came home with 5 new outfits for baby, plus new shoes! Everything is so cute, I want to buy it all (only in 100% washable materials of course). I had to put tons of stuff back because it was just getting out of hand (and plus since we're remodling the house, there is no where to put anything. Literally.) And wee little baby is miz petit. So even the 0-3 month X-mas dress I bought for her goes to her ankles. Today she wore some cute jeans with embroidered cuffs and a pale quilted jacket. Very stylish. I on the other hand wore the same pair of jeans I've been wearing all week and a shirt that had a baby burp spit stain on the shoulder that I did not see until the sun went down. And so it starts . . .
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Aug. 31st, 2005 @ 02:43 pm Feeling cranky
Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: Black Eyed Peas / Elephunk
I don't know why, but I'm just feeling so cranky. I think being pregnant is akin to being PMSed for 9 months! Maybe I have so much on my mind that I just can't take any one thing? I got to work today and was instantly annoyed by all the people pulling at me. I'm listening to Anxiety by the Black Eyed Peas and it is exactly how I feel! (I feel like I want to smack somebody. Turn around and bitch slap somebody.)

In other news, we've got day care lined up and all the baby stuff registered for. We even got a used bassinette for baby to sleep in so she does not have to sleep in a drawer. Whew!

READING: THE BIG OVER EASY by Jasper Fforde. He's so good, I have to ration out his books!
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Aug. 17th, 2005 @ 09:23 pm ipod love
Current Mood: happy
After jonsing and jonsing for an ipod, I finally broke down and bought a 20 gig and spent all weekend ripping music and downloading podcasts. It was great on this last trip. I finally get all those people with earphones in their ears. I'm not one of those people who always has to have music on, but it was nice to pass this time on this past trip where we spent more time flying there and back than in the two cities we visited. Now I'm obsessing on accessories--where is the speakers for my office? The connection in my car? Must speak to my Brother in law who is just as ocd as me and has already figured it all out.

The bad thing is all the time I've been playing with my ipod, I should be LOOKING AT BABY STUFF as the baby will be here in 45 DAYS!!!! Yikes. What are we doing????? Poor baby will be sleeping in a drawer!
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Jun. 20th, 2005 @ 08:41 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: sleepy
In NYC again, but this time with P, which is fantastic. So nice to business travel with him. Not only does he carry all the bags, but it's not so lonely. Even though I would say I'm usu. a loner, there is nothing lonlier than landing in a city where no one is really expecting you. The hotel is, but they won't think of anything if you don't show up. You could die and no one would know until you failed to show up at home. I guess it's like that everyday, but when travelling a whole week can go by before someone figured out you were missing.

Even though it's only 8 pm my time, I'm as tired as if it was 11 pm my time.

I'm feeling very strange because while I think I'm starting to look very pregnant. If you don't know me, you'd think I'd just ate too much at lunch. So I feel compelled to tell folks that I'm pregnant so that that will not think I'm fat. Dumb, no?
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Apr. 26th, 2005 @ 10:16 pm Says you!
Current Mood: chipper
P came home listening to Says You on NPR and we turned it on to listen to the end of it. Where do they find these smart, smart people and how do they know the most obscure things? Like the origin of "Covering your Nut" is originally a circus term. When the circus came to town, the head of the town would take the nut (as in nuts and bolts) off the main wheel so that the circus couldn't leave until it had earned enough $ to get their nut back. Who knew? Well this one guy knew--but he used to work for the circus! Now that I have a shorter commute (12 minutes) I don't listen to as much NPR as I used. Today I realized that I really missed it.

We went camping last weekend for my b-day. It rained two days. When it rained the 1st day, we were in total denial and couldn't make up our minds whether to ride it out or to pack it up and go home. So we took a nap, and when we woke up it was sunny. We got a huge tarp and spread it over the tent and it kept us warm, cozy and dry when it rained all night the next night. Nothing like being cozy and dry and hearing the rain on your tent!

Today I was talking to someone at work and she kept telling me to calm down and using that annoying "okayyyyyyy". The thing was I wasn't agitated or upset, I just talk really fast. Hmmm.
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Apr. 4th, 2005 @ 09:21 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: happy
As disturbing as it is to dream about someone at work, it’s 100% times more to be told that someone at work dreamt about you! Especially when it is the self-proclaimed office ladies’ man and he was able to describe one of my work outfits exactly. That’s just kinda yucky! I think I need to go shopping to get some new clothes!

It was so nice today to come home and have all that sunlight still! We took Edie for a walk and looked at all the blooming rose bushes in our neighborhood. Not our rose bushes of course, but everyone else’s seem to be in full flower.

We got a bunch of tomato plants this weekend at Tomatomania! for $3 each. They had over 300 varieties of tomato plants. P kept asking what about this one and I was like whatever. It’s a tomato. Our experiment this year will be a black heirloom tomato. We had a bunch of plants last year and it was great when all the fruit came in. It’s amazing how quickly you become resistant to paying for tomatoes at the grocery market.

STAR SIGHTING: Cindy Crawford with her beautiful kids not listening to her. She may be a super model. But that doesn't mean anything to kids who just want to do what they want to do.
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Mar. 29th, 2005 @ 08:36 am (no subject)
Current Mood: excited
What a beautiful day it was on Sunday. We had both my family and P's over for brunch and an egg hunt in our backyard. And everything was mellow, great and oh so enjoyable. Everyone had fun, including us and we are usually totally stressed out for many reasons:

- The girls were nice and polite and engaging instead of being rude and surly red-headed stepchildren (which ironically they are--not rude and surly--just redheads and they're my stepchildren.).

- We had a nice mix of ready-made and pre-made food so last-minute craziness in the kitchen was kept to a minimum.

- It was the 1st nice day in months to sit outside and eat and enjoy the spring that is a-coming.

Can't wait for more long, warm days!

Yesterday when I got into work I had a weird message from my ex on my work voice mail. Saying that he was sorry for everything that he had found Jesus and was happily re-married. How strange it that he's fine and happy and being taken care of (by JC and his new wife). What more can one ask for? Maybe now I can stop seeing him in every homeless person.

READING: KITE RUNNER by Khaled Hosseini. A friend had recommended this saying,” clear your calendar. Once you start, you can't put it down." And she was right. All I want to do is read, read, read. It's strange how a good book works. I can't wait to find one. And when I do, I read as much as I can till it's over. And then the search starts over again.
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Feb. 21st, 2005 @ 01:20 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: happy
I’m so happy to be home today. The past few years, I was tromping through the snow in New York at the Annual Toy Fair. It always seemed like fun to go to Toy Fair, but when I got there I realized how frustrating it actually is. It’s spread out over the city, so you’re trying to get all over place. It’s usually raining, snowing and always cold. (Hard to take for someone who grew up in Southern California. I had never even seen it snow until a few years ago when the big storm hit NY.) And when you see a cool toy, you can’t just buy it and take it home. It takes months for the actual toy to hit retail shelves. And on top of it I missed out on President's day.

But today I get to be at home, reading, napping, with a big pot of simmering tomato soup on the stove ready to be slurped with some toasted rosemary bread. Yum!

READING: BY SORROW’S RIVER by Larry McMurtry. This book has been so much sadder than the others and much more philosophical. :-(
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Feb. 13th, 2005 @ 12:50 pm Valentine's Day
Current Mood: melancholy
Current Music: Ray Charles Duets
We went to the ever-bountiful Target today to get Valentine's Day cards for the girls to pass out in their class tomorrow. Sticking to the Golden rule, the girls are to give one out to everyone in their class regardless of whether they like them or not.

I remember one year I got a "real" greeting card in class (the kind that cost $1 each vs. $1 for a box of 32) that was to "my special cousin." I remember being puzzled at the time, but soon realized that family was new to the country, and not knowing the language or the custom, went to the store and just bought a bunch of cards where they liked the picture on the card. Amazing to think that those parents spent $30 or so on what they thought was an American custom. I guess every immigrant has that kind of story where you just didn't know.

When we first came to America, my dad lived and worked in New York while we lived in Oregon for a period of time. He went to a deli once and saw Matzo ball soup and got all excited thinking it was chinese soup with a giant processed fish ball. He was very disappointed and to this day thinks Matzo ball soup is the blandest thing in the world. I think this is only funny if you know what a chinese fish ball is. If not, I guess you just think it's gross!

READING: THE WANDERING HILL by Larry McMurtry. He's so amazing with characters. If you're never read LONESOME DOVE, you need to put it on your list of things to do before you die. It's that good. I don't normally like or read westerns, but Lonesome Dove is so much more. It makes you want to swoon and you never want it to end.
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Feb. 9th, 2005 @ 08:32 am What's for dinner?
Current Mood: hungry
I hate thinking about dinner. And I wish I was so blasé about it that I could not worry about it and eat cold cereal for dinner. But I can't. And I hate coming up with something new every night. I usually have to think about it now, since I need to take something out of the freezer to defrost before I leave for work.

My sweetie worked at home for the past two years and dinner was his problem. Much as he hated it, something would be in the works by the time I got home. But now he's got a job in an actual office and since my work is closer, I'm always the 1st one home and my job to get dinner in the works.

Why is it, no matter what I have in the fridge / freezer / pantry, it's never what I want to eat? I bitched about it to my mom and she said he did it for two years. Now it's your turn. After two years you can complain. Nice, huh? Thought she was on my side!

So, what are you having for dinner?
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Feb. 6th, 2005 @ 09:51 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: nothing--listen to P running me a bath
I don’t know what is wrong with me, but I just don’t seem to have energy to do anything. I’m just really tired all the time. Today we slept til 9:45, which we never do when the girls are here. But they are at the age when they can get their own cereal so they don’t wake us in the morning when they are hungry anymore. P’s jetlagged from getting back from China on Friday, but what’s my excuse? I’ve in bed by 10 pretty much every night last week since I’ve been so tired. And I took an hour nap yesterday on top of it all. I think I really need to get up and move! Getting that blood circulating should wake me up!

P brought back a string of little red lanterns for Chinese New Year that we strung up in the living room. Very cute. I wanted to put up something last year on our front door but he thought it would be too ethnic and didn't want to do it. It's nice that he thought of it first this time and got us something cute that you can't get here.

READING: ALL THAT MATTERS by Jan Goldstein. Sappy, but sometimes it’s ok to read a sappy story. Especially when it's a short one. This seems like a perfect Lifetime Television for Women very special movie of the week. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/140130110X/qid=1107754423/sr=2-1/ref=pd_ka_b_2_1/104-0787975-9330300

WATCHING: SuperBowl. None of the ads were really that great this year. Oh yeah and the Eagles lost. How sad, but they tried really hard. Yipee! No more football for a few months!
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Feb. 1st, 2005 @ 09:50 pm Feb 1 already!
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: nada--wind blowing outside
I read in this month’s Real Simple, that while some people think time going by fast is due to how each day grows “shorter” in relation to the total time we’ve lived, psychologists say it’s actually due to routines that make one day indistinguishable from the next. To make each day stand out, we should jot down one interesting thing (even if it’s just “walked home with Mary”) in our date books. When we take a look back, we will remember the moments that add up to make up life. – Real Simple, March 2005, page 20.

So my thing for the day is watching my father-in-law re-enact how happy my dog is and what she does when she’s catching the Frisbee he just threw for her. Even though I was late for work and annoyed that he ambushed me in the driveway while I was trying to leave, that made me laugh. Then I was totally annoyed again, since by the time I was able to get into my car, the garbage truck was blocking my driveway and I couldn’t get out. Argh.

I love how the days are getting slightly longer every day. Today, I looked out at 5:30 and it was still light outside! Yipee!
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Jan. 30th, 2005 @ 06:08 pm Astrology.com
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Louis XIV -- Illegal Tender
“When you least expect it, the world as you know it will go all topsy-turvy. It won't be an ending (exactly), and certainly not an unpleasant one, but you may wake up today realizing that you're definitely not in Kansas anymore. This time out, even though you're not ordinarily fond of change, it won't bother you -- mostly because you've been planning this for a while now. Go ahead and put those plans in motion. It's time.” From Astrology.com

I don’t really believe in astrology—but I don’t really not believe either. It’s kind of like why tempt fate / the gods / the Universe—whatever. And I live in such fear that I read this and I think, “OMG, I’m gonna get laid off.” Why doesn’t my mind leap to something great? Like “OMG, I’m gonna win the lotto?”

I was really struggling in yoga this morning. With the girl in front of me flashing her thong and tattoo and the guy next to me wearing way too much scent for a guy (forget a guy in a yoga class) it was hard to go inward and just be.

READING: I, ELIZABETH by Rosalind Miles. I'm totally addicted. TOTALLY ADDICTED. I'm alternating between stories about Elizabeth and stories about Anne Boleyn. Where is the Tutor 12-step program?

WATCHING: DAILY SHOW. I love Jon Stewart. Can I marry him? He's so smart.
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Jan. 24th, 2005 @ 10:04 pm Not a Player
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: Killers
The girls are at a stage where they want to play Shop all the time. And their shop needs customers. Why one can't be the shopkeeper and the other the customer is beyond me. (Well actually it isn't. Its cuz one is a control freak and refuses to be customer. She can only RUN the shop. And the other one is passive-aggressive and refuses to do what the other one wants her to do. Very complex relationship, but I digress.) So they are always saying, "Can you come to our shop?" And I've realized that I don't want to. I'm usually running around doing a ton of chores around the house--who do they think washes all those juice cups anyway? And when I'm not doing chores, I don't want to play. I will cook with them, bake with them, take them places where they can play, but I don't want to play. Does this make me a bad person? Am I this way only because they are not my own blood? Would I have more obligations / desire to play if they were my biological kids? I don't think so. I don't really want to play make-believe with my niece and nephew either and they are my blood. I don't mind a board game or playing outside for a bit, but it has to have a finite end. As P says, maybe I have no inner child who wants to come out and play. My inner child is fine doing exactly what she is doing right now.
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Jan. 23rd, 2005 @ 08:42 pm Sunday Night Blues
Current Mood: content
Such a nice weekend. Beautiful weather when a storm is sweeping across parts of the country. Did some chores, read a lot, had good workouts both days, went to my women’s goal group and played with a newborn baby. All babies smell so baby-musky. It’s very strange—but nice.

We got a big organization thing for the girls’ room at Ikea this weekend and spent all Sat. putting it together and re-organizing the room. Very satisfying to organize things. The girls really enjoyed doing it too. It's true what they say--you can make anything into a game.

I had to talk myself out of doing work. There is always work to do, and I always bring some home on Friday night. But is it so much to ask to have a day or two where I don’t have to think about work? Am I just trying to justify things if I say I feel more productive at work when I’m not doing it 24 / 7? When I can have the weekend to live and come back to it on Monday morning with a fresh eye?

Having said that, a stressful thing came up on Friday and I dreamt about it on Friday night. I guess it is really stressful if it’s popping up in my dreams!

READING: THE SECRET DIARY OF ANNE BOLEYN by Robin Maxwell. Yea! More historical fiction—I’m obsessed by the Tudors! I don’t buy that she had a sixth finger and a 3rd breast. Would Henry really have married her if she did? Doesn’t that automatically label you a witch? Or from the Devil?

WATCHING: SUPERNANNY. I love this show. I want Supernanny to come to our house. I can’t wait for them to do a blended household. Very hard to discipline when you only get the kids less than part-time. Not that they are horrid. They are kids. When they’re being cute, they’re adorable. And when they are not, you want to wring their necks.
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Jan. 19th, 2005 @ 08:35 pm What kind of nation do you want to rule?
Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: nothing--sound of the dryer going
I heard a story on NPR last night about how small the current generation of North Korean kids are. According to one report, the average North Korean boy is less than 5 feet tall and under 100 pounds compared to his South Korean counterpart who is something like 5 foot 8. They are malnourished because they are starving and poorly educated since they are so malnourished they can’t really study. So Kim Il Sung is the ruler of a country, but he’s grounding them into nothingness. In less than two generations, they will truly be a nation of children—very small people who are not educated. (That part was my editorial, not NPR’s.)

What is the point of that? Yea, I’m the ruler of my very own country. Oh boo, because of my government they are tiny and can’t read. Very sad!

LINK: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4457283

Today on NPR, there was some story of a guy being deployed for Iraq who will most likely miss the birth of his twin girls—their 1st children that they’ve been trying to have for 10 years. Oh man, need to stop listening to NPR on the way home!

READING: LIGHT ON SNOW by Anita Shreve. Have always wanted to read her, but never did. Pretty good so far. Light but full of emotion.
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Jan. 17th, 2005 @ 10:42 pm Yea, MLK!
Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: Jack Johnston
It was so nice today to have the day off. I think I can easily be a housewife for a good year or so before I go completely stir crazy. I went to a yoga class this morning, then ran some errands and got myself a new bathing suit. I took Edie to the dog park, where watching all the dogs running around made me so happy. It’s very strange to have a holiday that is only somewhat observed. My mom, sister and I got it off. My husband and dad didn’t. Go figure.

I organized the girls' room. They’ve been tearing up pieces of paper and pretending that it is food. So there are scraps of paper all over the place in their “restaurant”. Tons of it. So much so that it must have taken them hours to tear it all up. I remember doing the same when I was their age. Very strange how certain “games” are universal.

I watched MEAN GIRLS today. So funny. I didn’t really get Tina Fey and why she’s so great, but I do now after watching it. She is my new hero.
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Jan. 13th, 2005 @ 03:33 pm Minibar!
Current Mood: pleased
Current Music: Maroon 5 -- Songs about Jane
The fabulous Lanyn helped me figure out how to add links since I was too stupid to do it myself. Thank you for the prompt service! Talk about instant gratification! So unlike the help desk at work because like many other places, they routed me to India. I know it is not their fault. And I am an immigrant and am very patient with people with accents since my parents have accents, but I CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY ARE SAYING. To the point where I just have to say, “I don’t know what you are saying.” And here we are 3 days later and my ticket is still open and the problem still not resolved. The only good thing is that I work for a large enough company that at least we have a help desk. My husband works at a small company and they have to figure it out themselves. Talk about frustration!

Went to a yummy place for dinner last night: MINI BAR on Cahuenga near Universal. How great to find a good place with a funky vibe in the Valley. I pray to the restaurant gods to open more of these!

LINK to citysearch: http://losangeles.citysearch.com/profile/39864851/los_angeles_ca/minibar.html?cslink=search_name_cust&ulink=search__searchslot1_520__1_profile_2_1
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Jan. 12th, 2005 @ 03:30 pm Hey, CIA agent, drop that pen now!
Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: Gwen Stefani -- L.A.M.B.
I watched OPEN WATER last night. Very scary. Now I don’t think I will ever go diving. I’m starting to question even going snorkeling. Yeah, the fish are cool and all that, but after a while, it’s like oh, another yellow fish. Once I was snorkeling and I accidentally inhaled and sucked in a ton of seawater, which immediately made me throw up. We saw lots of fish then!

No matter what happens, if my head is underwater, all I hear in my head is the Jaws theme music. Even if I’m in a pool—not logical, but who said fear is logical. Damn that Spielberg and his mechanical shark!

The movie was made all the more interesting with the news that a guy was pulled out of the sea safely after 14 days or whatever after being swept out to sea by the tsunami. Fish nibbled him on constantly. So it’s not just sharks to be afraid. It’s other fish too.

Interesting story from the Washington Post about writing books if you’re a CIA agent: The CIA is drafting new rules for agency employees who want to become authors following publication of a controversial critique of the war on terror by a counter terrorism official who headed the unit tracking Osaka bin Laden. (note: Microsoft Word says counter terrorism is two words. The Washington Post says it is one word.)
LINK: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A286-2005Jan11.htm

READING: LUCKY Magazine—latest issue came—yipee!
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Jan. 11th, 2005 @ 02:41 pm Pretty, pretty clouds!
Current Mood: content
Current Music: Maroon 5 --- Songs about Jane
After days of rain, it finally stopped. The sky is big and blue, and the air is so clean and clear. Amazingly beautiful. The past few days, I just stared outside in a low energy mood not doing very much. Today I’m just staring outside at the pretty clouds moving by . . .

Finally took all the Christmas stuff down and now the house looks very bare. I was organizing everything and instead of bitching about all the girls’ stuff and what a mess it was. I actually looked at it all. And realized that it wasn’t very much stuff at all. Books overflowing a small bookshelf. Junk piling on a kid-sized table and spilling out of a cubicle organizer thing. Not very much at all for two 6 year olds. And it made me feel compassion about how much life must suck when you have to go back and forth between three households constantly. What a drag.

Thought this from Publishers Lunch was very interesting and scary: Bookseller Fires Employee for Blogging
After a disciplinary hearing, Joe Gordon was fired by Waterstone's for things he posted on his blog, including calling the chain Bastardstone's and writing about his Evil Boss. Gordon worked for the company for 11 years, in one of their Edinburgh branches.

Gordon says the references were light-hearted, in the vein of Dilbert, and maintains that if his boss had simply asked him to refrain, he would have.

LINK to his blog: http://www.woolamaloo.org.uk/

READING: THE VIRGIN’S LOVER by Phillipa Gregory. Trashy and oh-so-good. I’d forgotten how good good historical fiction can be! Now I want to go the Renaissance Faire!
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